This is my physique as of now. I am amazed. I have curves. Ass, boobs, legs, you name it. I’m not perfect, but I look damn good. I almost can’t believe it.
I remember not being able to recognize myself in photos. I remember being ashamed to be seen in public. I remember when I realized that my elbows brushed my sides when I walked (As you can tell by that photo, I’d have to walk like a member of the Ministry of Silly Walks to accomplish that now).
I remember being invisible. Worse, I remember being very purposefully ignored.
Now I get cat-calls, honks, and I even almost caused an accident once, just from walking around to run errands. I get compliments from friends and strangers. People go out of their way to speak to me.
My brain short-circuits a little each time any of this happens. The initial stun is that someone has even noticed me. The lingering stutter in my brain is that I’m being admired. At first, I honestly thought people were complimenting me sarcastically, or speaking to me as some sort of joke (It’d happened often enough and my self-esteem was that low). That progressed to believing that I was being genuinely complimented or spoken to, yet at the same time being utterly baffled as to why.
Now, most of the time, I see what others see in me.
I see my beauty.