Well, I’ve finally figured some of my desires out! It only took two and half months of being single and a month of dating.
I have been asking myself a very pertinent question: What the fuck do I want?
Over the past 2.5 months, the answer to this has changed a lot. At first I wanted to be blissfully free from obligations. I wanted to be mostly alone. I started dating again when I started wanting company again.
But dating again has now lead me to need to get more specific with the question above. What do I want to get out of dating? What kind of relationships do I want? At first I didn’t care, but dating the Viking has made me aware of few things.
I am looking for companionship. Real, honest-to-fuck, reliable, frequent companionship. While I do not want the burden of being someone’s primary priority, nor do I want to have someone that is my own primary priority, I do want to be a priority. I want to be pursued just as much as I pursue. I’m starting to want an ‘anchor’.
The Viking is shit at pursuing me. However, I have an Aussie and a Brit that are amazing at showing interest and desire for me.
I might not know where all of these relationships are going, but I’m ok with that, because I finally know what the fuck I want.